“I Hope This Makes the Situation Clear”

The Plain English Campaign has announced its award-winners for 2007 (pdf link). Steve McClaren, England’s former football coach, has won the Foot in Mouth Award for this gem:

He (Wayne Rooney) is inexperienced, but he’s experienced in terms of what he’s been through.

The awards also include a Golden Bull category, and a winner in that category is this response from Virgin Trains to complaints about online booking:

Moving forwards, we as Virgin Trains are looking to take ownership of the flow in question to apply our pricing structure, thus resulting in this journey search appearing in the new category-matrix format. The pricing of this particular flow is an issue going back to 1996 and it is not something that we can change until 2008 at the earliest. I hope this makes the situation clear.

Immensely delightful. I’m sure editors at the Hindu are praying that these awards never come to India. Or else…

(Link via email from Aditya Kuber.)