Twitter & the Lok Sabha—Tweet Bank 1

Many of my India Uncut readers may not have the time or mental bandwidth to follow Twitter—as I didn’t until recently. So for you guys, every weekend, I’m going to collect all my tweets for the week in one post here. That way, you don’t miss out on my microblogging—and I’ll spare you random conversational tweets that may not interest you.

The first of my Tweet Banks begins below the fold. To follow me on Twitter, head on over to my Twitter page—you can also sign up for an account there and start tweeting yourself. I use Tweet Deck to tweet, and find it both useful and easy to use.

Tweet Bank 1—September 10 to 21

September 21

WTF news of the day—Mumbai DCP locks up flat with handcuffs:  about 12 hours ago

Well, now. Pritam Chakraborty is pissed because someone’s claiming credit for his tune: 

‘Blood dries up/Like rain, like rain/Fills my cup…’ – Love this live version even more than the original  about 13 hours ago

September 20

@TPMatz @soniafaleiro Tasks on Rahul’s Swayamwar: Take a punch; roll a joint; show telepathic skills ( More? #Swayamwar  about 18 hours ago

RT @soniafaleiro: @amitvarma re. Rahul Mahajan’s swayamvar, the chosen one has to be able to take a good punch.  about 19 hours ago

Another Swayamwar—this time it’s Rahul Mahajan: Why don’t they just hook up Rakhi and Rahul?  about 20 hours ago

‘Cathy, you know I never meant to hurt you.’ … and other last words on death row: (Via @Pjoseph85about 20 hours ago

Phrase of the day: ‘Ostentatious Austerity.’ (From 20 hours ago

[Tweets from September 10 to 19 follow below the fold.]

September 19

David K Levine pwns Paul Krugman — magnificent piece (via Prashant – 11:44 PM

@nilanjanaroy Alien sex can be out of this world. 11:36 PM in reply to nilanjanaroy

The freedom of solitude — Anita Desai on being an IWE in the 1960s: (via @nilanjanaroy ) 11:16 PM

Gift your cow a comfy sofa: 8:52 PM

Bob Herbert: It’s about race: David Brooks; It’s NOT about race: Also: 12:30 PM

‘The search for an FDR line’ — George Bush’s scriptwriter reveals the White House’s cluelessness re the bailouts. 12:12 PM

Markets in saliva: Where there’s a welfare scheme, there’s a scam. 4:16 AM

@vilakudy Both Murakamis, actually. I know Haruki’s the flavour, but check out Ryu Murakami’s ‘Piercing’. Masterpiece. 3:01 AM in reply to vilakudy

‘Netherland’ to be filmed by Sam Mendes. I loved the book’s unconventional structure & sense of drift. Tough adaptation. 2:58 AM

Raptorex sounds like a horny dino. ( There should so be a pondy remake of Jurassic Park. 2:54 AM

For those who asked, here’s Tom Vadakkan’s famous quote by itself: Context: (Edited by @sanjeevn) 2:53 AM

@amrithallan Both parties, yaar. When the BJP and the Congress agree on something, it’s time to be wary! 1:14 AM in reply to amrithallan

I had a divine steak the other day at Basilico. Was it once, perhaps, a holy cow? 12:41 AM

@atulmathew Well, in pol lingo, you could say I stayed on message. Also, I was in a remote location, sound-video lag etc, always harder. 12:37 AM in reply to atulmathew

@s4sukhdeep I agree. Why can’t these political parties have a Rakhi Sawant type as a spokeswoman. Much more airtime guaranteed. 12:35 AM in reply to s4sukhdeep

Also, Manish Tiwari of the Cong. was ‘fake live’, in TV lingo. They recorded his clips earlier, and asked him questions as if he was there. 12:31 AM

Back from CNN-IBN. RS Prasad said @shashitharoor insulted Indian culture by mentioning holy cows, and demanded his resignation. Surreal. 12:29 AM

September 18

@surekhapillai Hmm. Old learning: MSM mentions & TV appearances do not increase blog traffic or Twitter followers — those grow organically. 4:38 PM in reply to surekhapillai

I’m on CNN-IBN tonight, 10-10.30pm, on the @shashitharoor tweet. After yesterday (, can’t wait to hear the pols. 4:29 PM

Full video of the Times Now debate on @shashitharoor: QOTD: ‘Tweet is a very lonely man’ — Tom Vadakan (HT: @vrsaju) 3:33 PM

Finally Mahinder Watsa gives a sensible answer: ‘What has your scrotum done to deserve such treatment?’ 1:51 AM

No. 11 should be: I’m tweeting. Check out the top 10 excuses people use to avoid sex: 1:34 AM

As long as you don’t call them cows. RT @sruthijith: @amitvarma @gkjohn twitter has tweets; LS has twits? #pjs 12:28 AM

WTF quote of the day: ‘People think that I am this cerebral person because I have been the Miss Universe’ — Lara Dutta 12:22 AM

What’s the difference between Twitter and the Lok Sabha? Twitter allows 140 characters — the LS allows 552. 12:20 AM

In the land of the Cowma Sutra, how can anyone be lonely? 12:16 AM

My Cowmputer: RT @thecomicproject: … did you see this? 12:15 AM

@vrsaju @realmadrid_rock The pol was Tom Vadakan. He said he’s done ‘research’ on ‘Tweeter’, and has found that everyone on it is lonely. 12:13 AM

@mallumusings & @vivekjain98 : No idea about video, will post it if they upload it. @onejubb India’s Most Influential Tweeter is in Liberia. 12:09 AM

One more: RT @GautamGhosh: I’m not lonely – I just like hanging out with cows and cattle! 12:06 AM

There’s a T-shirt slogan right there: RT @mvatlarge: I’m not lonely, I’m just on an austerity drive. 12:03 AM

I’m waiting for the WTF trend stories on lonely people coming together via Twitter. Who’ll be first, Outlook or India Today? 12:02 AM

September 17

@iyermatter At least no one called me a cow. But I don’t get it -if we consider cows to be holy, why is it an insult to call someone a cow? 11:57 PM in reply to iyermatter

Thanks, all, got back a while ago from the Times Now studio. Did you catch that Congress dude saying everyone on Twitter is lonely? Wow. 11:54 PM

If you’re feelin raunchy/but your body’s paunchy/no muscles are there/nor any hair/at least do the eyebrows right: 7:08 PM

@Netra Sorry! I thanked everyone in 1 tweet, but I suck at the conversation aspect of Twitter. Hard to reply to each individual tweet … 🙁 6:59 PM in reply to Netra

WTF headline of the day: ‘Spanking Found To Have Negative Effects On Low-income Toddlers’: (via Chandni – @fundacause) 6:35 PM

Heh — RT @twilightfairy: tv in the bakground, i thot it’s tabu speaking, it was sachin tendulkar. 6:19 PM

I’ll be on Times Now’s “Newshour” tonight to discuss the controversial @shashitharoor tweet. My post on it: 5 PM

On IU today — Sehwag on chhakkas: Man Rapes Dog: YSRGate: 4:57 PM

The origin of Nike’s ‘Just Do It’ –Gary Gilmore facing the firing squad: (via 2:35 PM

‘Publishing is a casino’ – Dan Menaker: This holds for India too, though a growing market means a smaller crisis. 11:52 AM

September 16

Finally, a payoff: RT @nimbupani: Become an atheist and stop swine flu 😉 10:04 PM

Here’s Rediff on, heh, why sex is good for you: Convinced now? (via @bcsekaran) 1:56 PM

Who will guard the guardians? WTF news of the day: ‘Cops guarding coast rescued after being stranded at sea.’ 5:26 AM

For too many TV people, ‘research’ = ‘copy from the internet’. High Heel Confidential exposes Zing TV: 5:04 AM

High-class hucksterism vs low-class fear-mongering — Bob Samuelson on the battle over healthcare: via @gauravsabnis 1:05 AM

September 15

Smouldering Rajput princesses & cruelly handsome zamindars — all hail the new age of ‘Sari Rippers’: via @ambujsaxena. 10:35 PM

I’m an Edward Chap. Um, wait, that’s not quite it. Ok. I’m a Ted Fellow: (Congrats to @gkjohn as well.) 9:29 AM

Shhhh! RT @bigfatphoenix: @amitvarma Or politics to enter cricket. Or Lalit Modi to enter Narend . . no, wait. 😉 9:10 AM

Now all that’s left is for Lalit Modi to enter politics: 9:04 AM

via @rameshsrivats , the Dan Brown Plot Generator: 8:58 PM

Obama’s new neighbours should get a Spanish Water Dog. (via @soniafaleiro) 8:25 PM

On IU — Two headed snakes and the BJP; The illegal and non-austere Rajiv Gandhi Bhavan: 8:15 PM

Who woulda thunk? A writer tries to show off by editing Dan Brown and actually makes it worse. via @nilanjanaroy 7:55 PM

September 14

Alleged Bigg Boss 3 candidates: Sherlyn Chopra, Varun Gandhi, Kamal ‘Desh Drohi’ Khan. I can’t wait! 7:46 PM

WTF photogallery of the day — ‘Belly Beauties’ by TOI: Don’t miss the captions! 7:41 PM

WTF advice from Mahender Watsa: ‘Your only alternative is marriage.’ (3rd question.) 7:35 PM

On IU: The BJP’s gone batshit — now they’re against beer: 3:28 PM

RTI vs Bureaucracy — guess who’s winning: (Via Luv at 2:21 PM

More cocky than Cockery, but still kickass, here’s Danyl Johnson’s ‘With a Little Help From My Friends’: 6:05 AM

Just see this shot? Now to pick my jaw up from the floor. (via @nebuer42.) 5:57 AM

‘Which country has the most nose-jobs per-capita?’ asks Alex Tabarrok. You can work out the answer… 5:16 AM

On IU — ‘I’d like to ask for Sinead’s hand in marriage.’ 4:55 AM

September 13

Sex after death — presenting copulating cadavers: 5:52 PM

Yesterday, military-industrial complex. Today, financial regulatory complex. Tyler Cowen lays it out: 3:42 PM

Note to the RSS — samosas aren’t Hindu: 3:30 PM

Indian ministers continue their austerity drive. No more paapad: 3:19 PM

WTF indeed: RT @bigfatphoenix: @prempanicker Today’s Bobbili refers to Raj Singh Dungarpur as ‘uncrowned father’ of modern Indian cricket. 3:16 PM

September 12

On IU — Courtesy @bigfatphoenix , here’s Baba Ramdev teaching Yogic Jogging: 7:50 PM

If you thought the first two seasons of Bigg Boss were freakshows, see who they’ve invited this time: 1:49 PM

“A cow’s milk is not only for its calf, others also drink it.” The amazing story: of Shobhalal v Shobhalal: 1:40 PM

“Taxi driver fined for not wearing helmet”: Next the cops will catch me for not wearing a seatbelt while walking. 12:15 PM

WE WILL WHOOP YOUR ASS! Rocking post by @jhunjhunwala . 11:31 AM

On IU — Wali-ur-Rehman and Hakimullah Mehsud go WTF when South Africa threatens to start the Third World War: 2:31 AM

September 11

Syd Field on judging movies: “The two best critical tools I have are my bladder and my butt.” (From 7:24 PM

What an unfortunate acronym: 7:01 PM

Today is the eighth anniversary of an ear operation I had. Just sayin’… 6:58 PM

Do as I say, not as I do. BS Yeddyurappa, father of five, wants others to stop at two. (via @mihirmehta) 6:53 PM

RT @Shrabonti: @amitvarma You know, I read that as bloating accident. And it made so much sense! 12:52 PM

God gets pissed at Madonna and causes boating accident. Go figure. 12:35 PM

Word of the day: ‘Uninvite’. Frankfurt Book Fair organisers cave in to Chinese government. (via @nilanjanaroy) 12:23 PM

Coffee ran out, which means I can’t wake up. And if I can’t wake up, I can’t get more coffee. Bugger. 11:38 AM

On IU: Consider the irony — customs superintendent duped by Nigerian scamster. 1:49 AM

Hugh Hefner files for divorce. He caught his wife surfing porn. (Ok, I made up that second line…) 1:11 AM

Jai Alai! Pizza pie! Nellie Bly! More rye! 1:01 AM

September 10

Nine women spend two months in house thinking they’re taking part in Big Brother. What a scam! 11:25 PM

Fawning headline of the day: “US director praises Divya Dutta.” WTF? 10:55 PM

Thanks, Twitterverse, for the warm welcome! Apologies for not replying to each individual message/tweet. Still coming to terms with twitter. 10:54 PM

On IU: Who’s more primitive? 10:53 PM

I’m glad Ellen DeGeneres has replaced Paula Abdul: At least she won’t embarrass us by drooling over the boys. 4:45 PM

Who needs clothes when there are books to be read? (via @Pjoseph85) 4:33 PM

Keep your leg guard on. Aakash Chopra on how cricketers prepare for matches: 3:47 PM

“When you’ve got the mojo, you have to keep your foot on your opponent’s neck.’ — Maureen Dowd 2:43 PM

On IU — a comment on modern art? 2:30 PM

US airports ban… guess what. 2:06 PM

Aldous Huxley would have loved Wikipedia: 1:47 PM

On that note, here’s Dan Finkelstein on how the Beatles were “the early pioneers of globalisation.” (via Cafe Hayek.) 12:50 PM

In these times, do the Beatles still have so much cachet? 12:33 PM

A headline to get a book geek’s attention: 12:20 PM

I’m getting a sweet sense of schadenfreude: 12:17 PM

I’m sayin’, Barack, maybe Gandhiji ate a lot and just had a good metabolism. 11:54 AM

Without clicking on the link, make a guess — which starlet does this headline refer to: “Have Breasts, Will Talk”? 11:51 AM

Right, so I’m going to give Twitter a shot now, starting today, just for the heck of it. Bye bye, free time. 11:42 AM