{"id":4677,"date":"2008-07-10T05:59:00","date_gmt":"2008-07-10T00:29:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.indiauncut.com\/?p=2859"},"modified":"2008-07-10T05:59:00","modified_gmt":"2008-07-10T00:29:00","slug":"your-coffee-is-not-aroused","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/indiauncut.com\/your-coffee-is-not-aroused\/","title":{"rendered":"Your Coffee is Not Aroused"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>One of the pieces of advice many writing guides will give you is to keep it simple, and to prefer short words over long ones. Well, <a href=\"http:\/\/chandoo.org\/wp\/\" title=\"Pointy Haired Dilbert\">Pointy Haired Dilbert<\/a>, via email,&nbsp; points me to a resource that helps you do just this: <a href=\"http:\/\/www.ironicsans.com\/thsrs\/\" title=\"Thsrs -- The Shorter Thesaurus\">Thsrs&#8212;The Shorter Thesaurus<\/a>. <\/p>\n<p>Knowing what the typical India Uncut reader is likely to feed in there, I searched for shorter synonyms of &#8216;aroused&#8217;. One of the options I was offered was &#8216;horny&#8217;. So I looked at shorter options for &#8216;horny&#8217; and got &#8216;sexy&#8217;. (This assumes all sexy people are horny; every day I learn new things.) I fed in &#8216;sexy&#8217;, and got &#8216;hot&#8217;. <\/p>\n<p>The lesson to learn from this is that one should never say: &#8220;I like my coffee aroused.&#8221; Instead, always say: &#8220;I like my coffee hot.&#8221; Keep it simple.<\/p>\n<p><b>PS<\/b>: The half-Bengali in me is proud that Thsrs could not find shorter alternatives to &#8216;lobongolotika&#8217;. It <\/p>\n<p><s><\/p>\n<p>demonstrates<\/p>\n<p><\/s><\/p>\n<p> shows that we already keep it as simple as possible.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>One of the pieces of advice many writing guides will give you is to keep it simple, and to prefer short words over long ones. Well, <a href=\"http:\/\/chandoo.org\/wp\/\" title=\"Pointy Haired Dilbert\">Pointy Haired Dilbert<\/a>, via email,&nbsp; points me to a resource that helps you do just this: <a href=\"http:\/\/www.ironicsans.com\/thsrs\/\" title=\"Thsrs -- The Shorter Thesaurus\">Thsrs&#8212;The Shorter Thesaurus<\/a>. <\/p>\n<p>Knowing what the typical India Uncut reader is likely to feed in there, I searched for shorter synonyms of &#8216;aroused&#8217;. One of the options I was offered was &#8216;horny&#8217;. So I looked at shorter options for &#8216;horny&#8217; and got &#8216;sexy&#8217;. (This assumes all sexy people are horny; every day I learn new things.) I fed in &#8216;sexy&#8217;, and got &#8216;hot&#8217;. <\/p>\n<p>The lesson to learn from this is that one should never say: &#8220;I like my coffee aroused.&#8221; Instead, always say: &#8220;I like my coffee hot.&#8221; Keep it simple.<\/p>\n<p><b>PS<\/b>: The half-Bengali in me is proud that Thsrs could not find shorter alternatives to &#8216;lobongolotika&#8217;. It <\/p>\n<p><s><\/p>\n<p>demonstrates<\/p>\n<p><\/s><\/p>\n<p> shows that we already keep it as simple as possible.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[27],"tags":[],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v22.4 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>Your Coffee is Not Aroused - India Uncut<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/indiauncut.com\/your-coffee-is-not-aroused\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_GB\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Your Coffee is Not Aroused - India Uncut\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"One of the pieces of advice many writing guides will give you is to keep it simple, and to prefer short words over long ones. Well, Pointy Haired Dilbert, via email,&nbsp; points me to a resource that helps you do just this: Thsrs&#8212;The Shorter Thesaurus.  Knowing what the typical India Uncut reader is likely to feed in there, I searched for shorter synonyms of &#8216;aroused&#8217;. One of the options I was offered was &#8216;horny&#8217;. So I looked at shorter options for &#8216;horny&#8217; and got &#8216;sexy&#8217;. (This assumes all sexy people are horny; every day I learn new things.) I fed in &#8216;sexy&#8217;, and got &#8216;hot&#8217;.  The lesson to learn from this is that one should never say: &#8220;I like my coffee aroused.&#8221; Instead, always say: &#8220;I like my coffee hot.&#8221; Keep it simple. PS: The half-Bengali in me is proud that Thsrs could not find shorter alternatives to &#8216;lobongolotika&#8217;. It demonstrates shows that we already keep it as simple as possible.\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/indiauncut.com\/your-coffee-is-not-aroused\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"India Uncut\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2008-07-10T00:29:00+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:image\" content=\"https:\/\/indiauncut.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/09\/iu-placeholder4.png\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:width\" content=\"822\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:height\" content=\"800\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:type\" content=\"image\/png\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"Amit Varma\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:label1\" content=\"Written by\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data1\" content=\"Amit Varma\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:label2\" content=\"Estimated reading time\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data2\" content=\"1 minute\" \/>\n<script type=\"application\/ld+json\" class=\"yoast-schema-graph\">{\"@context\":\"https:\/\/schema.org\",\"@graph\":[{\"@type\":\"Article\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/indiauncut.com\/your-coffee-is-not-aroused\/#article\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/indiauncut.com\/your-coffee-is-not-aroused\/\"},\"author\":{\"name\":\"Amit Varma\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/indiauncut.com\/#\/schema\/person\/890a3d673b0c90c97d76c45a1754ac3c\"},\"headline\":\"Your Coffee is Not Aroused\",\"datePublished\":\"2008-07-10T00:29:00+00:00\",\"dateModified\":\"2008-07-10T00:29:00+00:00\",\"mainEntityOfPage\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/indiauncut.com\/your-coffee-is-not-aroused\/\"},\"wordCount\":168,\"commentCount\":0,\"publisher\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/indiauncut.com\/#\/schema\/person\/890a3d673b0c90c97d76c45a1754ac3c\"},\"articleSection\":[\"Miscellaneous\"],\"inLanguage\":\"en-GB\"},{\"@type\":\"WebPage\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/indiauncut.com\/your-coffee-is-not-aroused\/\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/indiauncut.com\/your-coffee-is-not-aroused\/\",\"name\":\"Your Coffee is Not Aroused - India Uncut\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/indiauncut.com\/#website\"},\"datePublished\":\"2008-07-10T00:29:00+00:00\",\"dateModified\":\"2008-07-10T00:29:00+00:00\",\"breadcrumb\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/indiauncut.com\/your-coffee-is-not-aroused\/#breadcrumb\"},\"inLanguage\":\"en-GB\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"ReadAction\",\"target\":[\"https:\/\/indiauncut.com\/your-coffee-is-not-aroused\/\"]}]},{\"@type\":\"BreadcrumbList\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/indiauncut.com\/your-coffee-is-not-aroused\/#breadcrumb\",\"itemListElement\":[{\"@type\":\"ListItem\",\"position\":1,\"name\":\"Home\",\"item\":\"https:\/\/indiauncut.com\/\"},{\"@type\":\"ListItem\",\"position\":2,\"name\":\"Your Coffee is Not Aroused\"}]},{\"@type\":\"WebSite\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/indiauncut.com\/#website\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/indiauncut.com\/\",\"name\":\"India Uncut\",\"description\":\"\",\"publisher\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/indiauncut.com\/#\/schema\/person\/890a3d673b0c90c97d76c45a1754ac3c\"},\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"SearchAction\",\"target\":{\"@type\":\"EntryPoint\",\"urlTemplate\":\"https:\/\/indiauncut.com\/?s={search_term_string}\"},\"query-input\":\"required name=search_term_string\"}],\"inLanguage\":\"en-GB\"},{\"@type\":[\"Person\",\"Organization\"],\"@id\":\"https:\/\/indiauncut.com\/#\/schema\/person\/890a3d673b0c90c97d76c45a1754ac3c\",\"name\":\"Amit Varma\",\"image\":{\"@type\":\"ImageObject\",\"inLanguage\":\"en-GB\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/indiauncut.com\/#\/schema\/person\/image\/\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/indiauncut.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/05\/amitvarma-bio.jpg\",\"contentUrl\":\"https:\/\/indiauncut.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/05\/amitvarma-bio.jpg\",\"width\":200,\"height\":200,\"caption\":\"Amit Varma\"},\"logo\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/indiauncut.com\/#\/schema\/person\/image\/\"}}]}<\/script>\n<!-- \/ Yoast SEO plugin. -->","yoast_head_json":{"title":"Your Coffee is Not Aroused - India Uncut","robots":{"index":"index","follow":"follow","max-snippet":"max-snippet:-1","max-image-preview":"max-image-preview:large","max-video-preview":"max-video-preview:-1"},"canonical":"https:\/\/indiauncut.com\/your-coffee-is-not-aroused\/","og_locale":"en_GB","og_type":"article","og_title":"Your Coffee is Not Aroused - India Uncut","og_description":"One of the pieces of advice many writing guides will give you is to keep it simple, and to prefer short words over long ones. Well, Pointy Haired Dilbert, via email,&nbsp; points me to a resource that helps you do just this: Thsrs&#8212;The Shorter Thesaurus.  Knowing what the typical India Uncut reader is likely to feed in there, I searched for shorter synonyms of &#8216;aroused&#8217;. One of the options I was offered was &#8216;horny&#8217;. So I looked at shorter options for &#8216;horny&#8217; and got &#8216;sexy&#8217;. (This assumes all sexy people are horny; every day I learn new things.) I fed in &#8216;sexy&#8217;, and got &#8216;hot&#8217;.  The lesson to learn from this is that one should never say: &#8220;I like my coffee aroused.&#8221; Instead, always say: &#8220;I like my coffee hot.&#8221; Keep it simple. PS: The half-Bengali in me is proud that Thsrs could not find shorter alternatives to &#8216;lobongolotika&#8217;. It demonstrates shows that we already keep it as simple as possible.","og_url":"https:\/\/indiauncut.com\/your-coffee-is-not-aroused\/","og_site_name":"India Uncut","article_published_time":"2008-07-10T00:29:00+00:00","og_image":[{"width":822,"height":800,"url":"https:\/\/indiauncut.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/09\/iu-placeholder4.png","type":"image\/png"}],"author":"Amit Varma","twitter_card":"summary_large_image","twitter_misc":{"Written by":"Amit Varma","Estimated reading time":"1 minute"},"schema":{"@context":"https:\/\/schema.org","@graph":[{"@type":"Article","@id":"https:\/\/indiauncut.com\/your-coffee-is-not-aroused\/#article","isPartOf":{"@id":"https:\/\/indiauncut.com\/your-coffee-is-not-aroused\/"},"author":{"name":"Amit Varma","@id":"https:\/\/indiauncut.com\/#\/schema\/person\/890a3d673b0c90c97d76c45a1754ac3c"},"headline":"Your Coffee is Not Aroused","datePublished":"2008-07-10T00:29:00+00:00","dateModified":"2008-07-10T00:29:00+00:00","mainEntityOfPage":{"@id":"https:\/\/indiauncut.com\/your-coffee-is-not-aroused\/"},"wordCount":168,"commentCount":0,"publisher":{"@id":"https:\/\/indiauncut.com\/#\/schema\/person\/890a3d673b0c90c97d76c45a1754ac3c"},"articleSection":["Miscellaneous"],"inLanguage":"en-GB"},{"@type":"WebPage","@id":"https:\/\/indiauncut.com\/your-coffee-is-not-aroused\/","url":"https:\/\/indiauncut.com\/your-coffee-is-not-aroused\/","name":"Your Coffee is Not Aroused - India Uncut","isPartOf":{"@id":"https:\/\/indiauncut.com\/#website"},"datePublished":"2008-07-10T00:29:00+00:00","dateModified":"2008-07-10T00:29:00+00:00","breadcrumb":{"@id":"https:\/\/indiauncut.com\/your-coffee-is-not-aroused\/#breadcrumb"},"inLanguage":"en-GB","potentialAction":[{"@type":"ReadAction","target":["https:\/\/indiauncut.com\/your-coffee-is-not-aroused\/"]}]},{"@type":"BreadcrumbList","@id":"https:\/\/indiauncut.com\/your-coffee-is-not-aroused\/#breadcrumb","itemListElement":[{"@type":"ListItem","position":1,"name":"Home","item":"https:\/\/indiauncut.com\/"},{"@type":"ListItem","position":2,"name":"Your Coffee is Not Aroused"}]},{"@type":"WebSite","@id":"https:\/\/indiauncut.com\/#website","url":"https:\/\/indiauncut.com\/","name":"India Uncut","description":"","publisher":{"@id":"https:\/\/indiauncut.com\/#\/schema\/person\/890a3d673b0c90c97d76c45a1754ac3c"},"potentialAction":[{"@type":"SearchAction","target":{"@type":"EntryPoint","urlTemplate":"https:\/\/indiauncut.com\/?s={search_term_string}"},"query-input":"required name=search_term_string"}],"inLanguage":"en-GB"},{"@type":["Person","Organization"],"@id":"https:\/\/indiauncut.com\/#\/schema\/person\/890a3d673b0c90c97d76c45a1754ac3c","name":"Amit Varma","image":{"@type":"ImageObject","inLanguage":"en-GB","@id":"https:\/\/indiauncut.com\/#\/schema\/person\/image\/","url":"https:\/\/indiauncut.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/05\/amitvarma-bio.jpg","contentUrl":"https:\/\/indiauncut.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/05\/amitvarma-bio.jpg","width":200,"height":200,"caption":"Amit Varma"},"logo":{"@id":"https:\/\/indiauncut.com\/#\/schema\/person\/image\/"}}]}},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/indiauncut.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4677"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/indiauncut.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/indiauncut.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/indiauncut.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/indiauncut.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=4677"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/indiauncut.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4677\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/indiauncut.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=4677"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/indiauncut.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=4677"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/indiauncut.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=4677"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}