{"id":4988,"date":"2008-03-07T00:37:00","date_gmt":"2008-03-06T19:07:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.indiauncut.com\/?p=2468"},"modified":"2008-03-07T00:37:00","modified_gmt":"2008-03-06T19:07:00","slug":"dont-you-die-tonight","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/indiauncut.com\/dont-you-die-tonight\/","title":{"rendered":"Don\u2019t You Die Tonight"},"content":{"rendered":"

All you who sleep tonight
\nFar from the ones you love,
\nNo hand to left or right
\nA coffin lid above –<\/p>\n

Know that you aren’t alone
\nMany others share your fate,
\nYou’re lucky you’ve already gone,
\nOr you’d have to wait.<\/i><\/p>\n

My apologies to Vikram Seth, but I couldn’t resist being inspired after reading the WTF news of the day<\/a>:<\/p>\n

\n

The mayor of a village in southwest France has threatened residents with severe punishment if they die, because there is no room left in the overcrowded cemetery to bury them.<\/p>\n

In an ordinance posted in the council offices, Mayor Gerard Lalanne told the 260 residents of the village of Sarpourenx that “all persons not having a plot in the cemetery and wishing to be buried in Sarpourenx are forbidden from dying in the parish.”<\/p>\n

It added: “Offenders will be severely punished.”<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n

I’d love to be the cop responsible for punishing offenders. <\/p>\n

Constable Varma, I haven’t seen you for a week, where have you been?<\/i><\/p>\n

Sir, remember the old lady who popped it last Sunday? I went to the afterlife looking for her.<\/i><\/p>\n

I see. And you bought an “I love Cannes” T-shirt over there?<\/i><\/p>\n

(Link via email from Phani Vajapeyazula<\/a>.)<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

All you who sleep tonight
\nFar from the ones you love,
\nNo hand to left or right
\nA coffin lid above –<\/p>\n

Know that you aren’t alone
\nMany others share your fate,
\nYou’re lucky you’ve already gone,
\nOr you’d have to wait.<\/i><\/p>\n

My apologies to Vikram Seth, but I couldn’t resist being inspired after reading the WTF news of the day<\/a>:<\/p>\n

\n

The mayor of a village in southwest France has threatened residents with severe punishment if they die, because there is no room left in the overcrowded cemetery to bury them.<\/p>\n

In an ordinance posted in the council offices, Mayor Gerard Lalanne told the 260 residents of the village of Sarpourenx that “all persons not having a plot in the cemetery and wishing to be buried in Sarpourenx are forbidden from dying in the parish.”<\/p>\n

It added: “Offenders will be severely punished.”<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n

I’d love to be the cop responsible for punishing offenders. <\/p>\n

Constable Varma, I haven’t seen you for a week, where have you been?<\/i><\/p>\n

Sir, remember the old lady who popped it last Sunday? I went to the afterlife looking for her.<\/i><\/p>\n

I see. and you bought an “I love Cannes” T-shirt over there?<\/i><\/p>\n

(Link via email from Phani Vajapeyazula.)<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[33,15,17],"tags":[],"yoast_head":"\nDon\u2019t You Die Tonight - India Uncut<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/indiauncut.com\/dont-you-die-tonight\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_GB\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Don\u2019t You Die Tonight - India Uncut\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"All you who sleep tonight Far from the ones you love, No hand to left or right A coffin lid above - Know that you aren’t alone Many others share your fate, You’re lucky you’ve already gone, Or you’d have to wait. 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