Month: April 2008

Mr Moon Has Left The Building. Meet Mr Ban

Via messenger chat with Filmiholic, I receive this superb letter sent by Vijay Nambiar, “Chef de Cabinet” at the UN, about how to pronounce Ban Ki-Moon’s name:

image

(There’s a slightly bigger version here.)

I so love the way bureaucrats write. “[D]isseminate this appropriately and discreetly,” it seems. Heh.

Obligatory PJ: What does BAN Ki-moon do every time someone calls out his full name?

Ans: He turns around and drops his pants.

Another one: Why does Andrew Symonds turn around and drop his pants when someone says BAN Ki-moon’s name in front of him?

Ans: He mishears it as “Monkey, moon!”

Ya, ya, be shocked for all I care. No political correctness on this blog.

Deconstruction

The comment of the day comes from Hilary Barnes on Stanley Fish’s blog:

[D]econstruction … has the consequence, said Roger Scruton, that no text really says anything, including the text which says so; deconstruction deconstructs itself and disappears up its own behind, leaving only a disembodied smile and a faint small of sulphur.

This remind me of the famous graphic, Derrida Obituary Deconstructed.

Earlier: The Nude Bodies of Ranbir Kapoor and Shah Rukh Khan

Sex-Education Education

The WTF quote of the day comes from Nawab Malik, an NCP MLA who opposes sex education in schools:

What is the need for us to appoint sex gurus? Europe needs sex education because of its declining population rates.

There are other quotes on that page as well, invoking “Indian culture”, “the socio-cultural fabric of the country” and suchlike. Yawn. All these gentlemen seem to think that sex education means learning how to have sex, and I think they need to be educated about sex education. I suppose you could call that sex-education education.

Reading Should be Fun

The quote of the day comes from Nick Hornby:

Every time people force themselves to carry on with a book they’re not enjoying, they reinforce the idea that reading is a duty.

So if you’re in the middle of reading a tedious book that seems more like a chore than a joy, put it aside. Read this blog instead. Let India Uncut be your guilty pleasure!

Where Your Taxes Go: 31

In unnecessary gizmos for government bigwigs—especially ones that will keep them occupied during traffic jams. Mid Day reports that Mumbai’s mayor Shubha Raul recently threw a “tantrum” and demanded a laptop.

“Raul liked the additional municipal commissioner’s laptop and said she wanted one like it, but we gave her a better model,” said an IT officer. “It’s the best laptop in the BMC.”

Raul obviously is happy. “Who doesn’t want to get the best in the world? I am no exception. At least now, when I’m stuck in traffic jams, I can entertain myself with the laptop. I have never been tech savvy, but I will learn,” said Raul.

I don’t grudge our mayor a laptop, even if her post is largely ceremonial, but see the one she got. It’s a Toshiba Qosmio G40 costing Rs. 1.65 lakh. That’s like buying a Merc as an official car—it’s simply not necessary. I bought a beautiful Dell Inspiron 1525 a month ago for 45k, and it performs every function the mayor could possibly require—unless she’s editing films or creating special effects for Star Trek .

And see the woman’s gumption. Who doesn’t want to get the best in the world? she says. That’s my money you’re spending, Mrs Raul. Have some shame.

(Link via email from Amol Chavan. For more on how our government loots us, check out my Taxes Archive.)