This is the 40th installment of Rhyme and Reason, my weekly set of limericks for the Sunday Times of India edit page.
NOT IN MY NAME
When the country is torn, bit by bit,
Those who are silent are complicit.
If it fills you with shame,
Then shout: “Not in my name!”
Shake your apathy. Do not submit.
SMRITI MANDHANA
Indian cricket’s got a new face,
A left-hander with timing and grace.
Her strokeplay, by and by,
Makes me wonder why I
Thought women’s cricket was commonplace.
This is the 39th installment of Rhyme and Reason, my weekly set of limericks for the Sunday Times of India edit page.
PROCRASTINATION
Do you know what’s my greatest sorrow?
Time is something you cannot borrow.
So the days go by,
As I watch paint dry,
And sit here waiting for tomorrow.
K VS K
Kumble said, “Get me out of this jail.
It’s so sad that I’m the one to bail.”
Kohli said, with a groan,
“It’s my house they will stone
When we lose. That’s why I should prevail.”
This is the 38th installment of Rhyme and Reason, my weekly set of limericks for the Sunday Times of India edit page.
EASY OPTION
It’s the season for farm-loan waivers.
They don’t do farmers any favours.
They just perpetuate
Their deplorable fate.
Handouts can never be lifesavers.
WHO’S MORE MACHO?
Trump and Modi are all set to meet.
Trump will be full of orange conceit.
Modi will keep it cool:
“Your hands are minuscule.
My 56-inch chest can’t be beat.”
This is the 37th installment of Rhyme and Reason, my weekly set of limericks for the Sunday Times of India edit page.
THEFT
We are paying Krishi Kalyan Cess.
Even then, farmers are in a mess.
This only illustrates
How governance abates,
While our taxes remain in excess.
CONSENT
A friend asked, “Why be against Aadhaar?
We give our data to the bazaar,
Like Google, for instance.
Then why this resistance?”
I said, “Because Consent matters, yaar!”
*
And here’s a bonus limerick that didn’t appear in the paper:
NDTV
Most bullies are wimps, really afraid
That someone will rain on their parade.
Like Modi and his men,
So macho, except when
Someone fights back. Then they call a raid.
This is the 36th installment of Rhyme and Reason, my weekly set of limericks for the Sunday Times of India edit page.
A PEACOCK’S LAMENT
My friend, a peacock who lived alone,
Came to me, and started to bemoan,
“That judge said, ‘When you cry,
You get kids.’ That’s a lie!
I keep crying, but I’m on my own.”
HUMAN SHIELD
Human rights must be so very cheap
When you can tie someone to a jeep.
This tryst with destiny
Brought such ignominy.
How far we have fallen, and how deep?
This is the 35th installment of Rhyme and Reason, my weekly set of limericks for the Sunday Times of India edit page.
GST
The Goods and Services Tax is here.
Most other taxes will disappear.
One massive overhaul.
One tax to rule them all,
Till the slabs and exemptions appear.
OVERDOSE
So much cricket is driving me mad.
The IPL had seemed just a fad.
Cricket is such a bore,
I will watch it no more.
(Except today’s final, let me add.)
*
Also hear: Episode 3 of my weekly podcast, The Seen and the Unseen, with Devangshu Datta, which was about the GST:
This is the 34th installment of Rhyme and Reason, my weekly set of limericks for the Sunday Times of India edit page.
NAAM KATAPPA
My dad asked me if Dawood was dead.
Did he die peacefully in his bed?
Well, listen up, Appa,
We did send Katappa,
And it looks like he got Dawood’s head.
REAL ESTATE
The Vadras have a problem with land.
Well, here’s what I do not understand:
Since there’s such discontent,
Why doesn’t this government
Prosecute them, and not just grandstand?
This is the 33rd installment of Rhyme and Reason, my weekly set of limericks for the Sunday Times of India edit page.
LAL SALAAM
One day Prime Minister Modi said,
“Red light culture should be put to bed.
No more beacon on car.”
I said, “This won’t go far.
VIPs have red lights on their head.”
SONU
I met a singer who seemed bereft.
He looked sleepy, and had no hair left.
He told me with a pout,
“I’m gonna carry out
The biggest ever loudspeaker theft.”
This is the 32nd installment of Rhyme and Reason, my weekly set of limericks for the Sunday Times of India edit page.
PRAWN
Once there was a Minister of Prawn,
Who got loosies and felt quite forlorn.
He chose to regulate
What went onto your plate.
What a great way to show off his brawn.
WINE
Once there was a judge who liked his wine.
When he drank it, he felt so divine.
One day he crashed his car
Into a highway bar,
And said, ‘The fault is the bar’s, not mine.’
This is the 31st installment of Rhyme and Reason, my weekly set of limericks for the Sunday Times of India edit page.
INCENTIVES
There is a Yogi who cares for cows.
He wants to protect them anyhow.
He doesn’t understand,
Because slaughter is banned,
There’ll be fewer cows in UP now.
DOMESTIC TRANSACTION
A man asked his wife, very nicely,
“Can you please give me some strong coffee?”
She demanded kisses,
And said, “I’m your missus.
Despite that, you must pay GST.”
